how much courage does it take to move out of your comfort zone and search for the truth?

how much pain are you willing to bear to understand the truth that may hurt deep down into the spine?

how much would you do for a friend you never did trust at first?


one day, you began to realise that nothing can be seen at face value, that what you see is not exactly what you get. that what you get is not really truly whatever you get too.


i believe in personal relationship more than the relationship, the health of a group. trust should be forged between two person regardless of any circumstances. little did i realise how trust can be compared and how its can be compared to a level where there leaves a casualty. where the smaller trust results in distrust and betrayal.


this is to a girl who meant quite significantly to me.

i dont know what happened but things went into a downfall. and its an irony because it had to be us. when all things were crazily fine. when i thought our friendship was splendid and nothing could break the two of us up, or maybe the three of us up, there seems to be an increasing pressure of mistrust. is it because it may seem too perfect, that doubts started to surface? or is it of external factors that relinquish the trust that we always had with one another?

i would never doubt you, but it seems i have grown tired of explaining times again and again about myself. of course, i would want to be innocent but the other party would be closer to your heart and it would be a difficult situation. i remembered telling you that trust is always relative and its very different from truth. letting go is much easier than letting in, and i can no longer explain anymore. what's best for you is for you to be in your comfort zone and not have turbulence trying to find the truth in me. all i ever wanted is for you to be happy, even if it would mean you not getting the side of the story.

al that is left for me to say is for you to believe in me.

because never have i encountered such misunderstanding, such psychological attack on an already wounded,exhausted soul of mine. i will do fine without your support, but i will not do fine with a resentment from your part.

from the very beginning, when we have already met, we are and will forever be friends. but i can no longer be comfortable with expressing myself to you again.

sorry for creating such opportunity for an ending. it is in my deepest regret.

and thank you for everything really. for those times spent knowing that i played a part in
crafting your life story and for you to have crafted my very own.

friends forever. :)