Sunday, November 18, 2007
"look at this photograph, everytime i do it makes me laugh.." Photograph- Nickelbackflipping through the pages of a photo album, peppered with photographs, color and greyscale, i see all the smiles of the people i love and would regard as my loved ones forever. captured forever are the smiles, the youth, the radiance and especially the togetherness; the connectivity that still binds us today, binding us forever in each brilliantly-taken photo with love.it's no wonder that our moods are always at cloud nine, always at our best, because never will we take a photo of a moment of sadness, anguish, pain. but then, this meant that photographs arent stories of our lives. they are stories, chapters of our happiness. but as time passes, we live what we called life and go about toiling, persevering, long forgetting about those memories that was left behind in smooth paperbacks, frozen in time. did we take a photo so that we can remember the happiness? did we take them so that we can look back on all those beautiful emotions? or did we take them, as an excuse to tell ourselves that we did enjoy life, and so the hardship is worth it?when i looked back at all those photos my mom suddenly showed it to me, the word nostalgic came to my mind. the nostalgia wasnt from friendship, it was really family. after grandmother passed away, the whole family of relatives and all seemed to grow more sensitive, like the fabric of life grew alittle less, alittle more fragile. i know i felt that way, and when i looked at the photos, some of them with grandmother inside, lively and smiling prettily with obvious signs of aging, never would i thought she would one day be gone, i felt funny. a burning sensation of wanting to go back to the past.then there were photos of me when i was growing up, when i was a mere toddler, innocent, and devoid of the feelings that i have now, devoid of comprehension and knowing only fun. frozen in action, i see myself chewing toys, looking cheeky.of coursethe smiles are always there.it awes me to know that before me, life had continued for my parents, for my uncles and aunties, when their parents were alittle younger, my grandmother. when my father was so much younger and when mom and dad were courting and then finally married. i couldnt help but look at the people around the photos, oblivious to the snapping of the bulky camera, my uncles and anyone i know now captured in candid. they had their cool moments then. it awes me to realise that sometimes i am confused with the amount of time we are given. sometimes its incredibly fast and you cant get enough, but when you look back into the past, it seems eons away when its only 17 years of my age.when life gets so tough, some people goes back to looking at photographs, but wouldnt that make it all the more sadder? to know that what's once present is now no longer existent. to know that those happiness, those youth will never be the same again? that should be what my mom thinks when she looks back.but looking at such photos, it really doesnt fail to make you smile. i know i did. and a genuine smile that is near extinct now in this world. even if it meant looking at someone you dont quite know but hes actually you four times smaller and that much cuter.
if you got the time, look back once more. take out that ancient, crumpled photo album with one side of the cover missing. immerse yourself in forgotten memories, for they will surely bring you further. for those smiles and laughters are priceless beyond anything we can ever get.
12:53 AM
